I love reading. It is one way for me to learn, take my mind of my phone or laptop, and make better use of my time.
I am happy for that I always hoped I would be a reader, and for years, I was unable to find peace and focus to read.
My reading habit has improved for the past 2 or 3 years. My already-read list has become longer each year, and I find so much solice in reading now ridding of my imposter syndrome, thinking that I was just faking as a reader, and realizing any reading is reading if I do it with mindfulness and enjoyment.
Reading is not hard, it’s the thoughts existing between me and reading were the issues. Imposter syndrome as I said before was one of those negative thoughts. Without knowledge of what a reader should be, I was aiming for something much more sophisticated and overwhelming than the act of just reading. I thought a reader must be: smart, diligent, and a “nerd”. I was none of that. I felt like I was faking to be someone better than me. I was never able to get over that glorious image of a “reader”.
After I realized that I could be a reader simply by starting reading, I felt a bit better. I gained more confidence in my ability to “read”, enjoy reading, and retain lessons. I rid of my expectations at first and just read, focus on a page at a time. I learn to enjoy reading whatever I read: an article, a novel, a manga, a self-development book, whatever I could get my hands on. I tried e-books, audio books, summary of books, and printed books.
My reading wasn’t and isn’t perfect. Last year, I finished around 20 books in 2023. I don’t think I can recall all of them or the lessons I learnt from them. But I also know that the reading journey is not supposed to be perfect, it is just supposed to be consistent.
So I kept doing it imperfectly but consistently.
And now, I feel it is such a natural thing for me to have a physical book, read on the train, or before bed. It is such a natural thing to read and mark important sentences with my post-it flags, it is natural to get to the end of a book.
Reading is a wonderful thing, I can travel back in time, to the future, or onto space. I can explore and get deep into someone’s brains and hearts. I can escape reality, or explore reality any time I want.
So I keep reading.
And now I call myself a reader. I am a reader.
Regards,
Thao
#Day26 #30DayWritingChallenge